Overindulging & Underperforming- What Not to Do On Weight loss

December has passed us now. I am more than happy about it.
The struggle is real! December came and I added on quite some extra work to cover Christmas. I am a freelancer and do not have paid holidays.
( Building a sinking fund for just this reason!)
So with extra work came fewer hours to work out. I know working out cannot cancel a bad diet, but I think my diet is pretty OK. Until. Well until it is not. For me these two things go hand in hand. I work out and I eat well. I do not work out, I eat badly.
I think that these two keep themselves accountable. But truth to be told, I am having a hard time with the 80% diet 20% exercise for weight loss. I grew up with 100% physical activity leads to weight loss, and it is a hard pill to swallow, this new data.

alone bed bedroom blur
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December and the Almighty Overindulging Month

December came and with the extra work, I started slipping with my diet. Overeating here, and overeating there.
” One thing sometimes is OK”
Of course- if it sometimes. My only problem has always been and will most probably always be:
The sometimes coming more and more often. This is exactly what happened. Eating a cookie more here, and a mayo potato salad here.
Maybe you want an extra serving of that my lady? – Well of course yes!

Training came less and less often.

Then I escaped to Barcelona for a week. The intention was of course good. I think that we got out 3 times in a 7 days trip. Only thing that I outdid all of that nice moving around with my eating and drinking.
You cannot outdo a bad diet with exercise, but what you for sure can do is outdo a good exercise with shitty eating!
From intermitted fasting to overindulging. Working-out 5-6 times a week till about 2-3. Not drinking alcohol to having it on a daily basis. None of this was really beneficial for me.

Then Came Christmas. Oh My Oh My


Potato salad, mayo, cookies, chocolate, eggnog, then some more cookies and potato salad. Then few more chocolates. NO and I mean NO walks or runs or work out. It was 3 to 4 days of absolutely nothing. Well, we had the fare share of Christmas fairytales. Movies hour after hour.
Me sleeping about every single day for about 10 hours straight and with a daily nap of about 2 hours.
How all my implemented measures and ways totally and utterly just crackled down on me. Not even pretending to do anything.
I do not like this idea, to “be good” and then have “cheat days” and after that repent and ” be back on track”. I just find it inherently wrong to have this idea about food, and exercise and any regimen you may have.
This lockdown was not doing anything easier either. We have to stay in from 9PM to 5AM. Curfew is killing any time in the evening to try to manage something.

I did all that I had set out not to do. Overindulged and underperformed.

I set it out as my goal and it totally fing failed. I am so disappointed. I am not going to pretend other. I let myself totally go and that is what I have set out not to do. I do not want to live this way of up and down and back and forth.
Overfill myself to after that starve myself and then just stuff, stuff, and then stuff myself. This is not healthy and doable. This is not how I do want to live. I do not want to just let every habit and thing I have built up, be crushed down and by no one else than me. I prefer something else. What I am not entirely sure of yet. But I know that if I will find peace with myself, I have to find a new way how to interact with food, activities, and the thoughts I have about them.

neon signage
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